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Resolutions and Expectations

The past year, well the past couple of years really have been bizarre and a huge struggle for a lot of people, myself included.

And then we get to the New Year and there are a huge amount of expectations. Resolutions seem to be being thrown around social media in the first few days of January. There are a lot of resolutions about giving up things such as alcohol, chocolate, meat and going on diets and/or starting a new fitness regime. Not in this household (just in case you wondered).

I struggle with January. I love the festive season A LOT (see my Christmas witch blog post) for more details. So, when the festivities are over, and the decorations have come down it seems to be a bit of a damp squib feeling. Although this year was a little different, as our house is still in the throws of renovations we didn’t put up any decorations this year. Which in itself was totally weird and if I am honest, a little bit sad.

January of course has its own very special energies and you can work some really powerful magic during this month.

But I find it hard to be motivated to do any of it to be honest. The most I managed on 1st January was to open the back door to let out the old, negative energy and then open the front door to let the new and positive energy in.

Usually one of the first things I do at the beginning of January is redress my altar but mainly because I had to take it down in December to fit the snow village on. This year I didn’t even need to do that, as all my altar bits and bobs are packed away.

That weird week in between Christmas and New Year is kind of a holding pattern, although again to be fair the last three months have been a bit Ground Hog day for us here with the renovations. Everything seems in limbo until we go back to work and the children go back to school in January. Routines are off or non existent and it throws everything out.

But do you know what? I have decided not to beat myself up about it. My deities are there, they know I am here and that I am dedicated to them. If they know me at all (and they ought to) they will be patient and will understand that I haven’t forgotten them.

No matter how long or how short a time you have been practising witchcraft (Druidry, magic or whatever pathway you follow) there will always be times when your practise wanes. It is the reality of life, it ebbs and flows. And I absolutely believe that the seasons and even the months will have an affect on how you feel spiritually and magically.

I have seen advice on social media to ‘throw out all the leftover food’ – what? How is that sensible, eco friendly or cost effective. That sounds like just plain wasteful madness to me. The same advice also suggested going through all your presents and re gifting, donating to charity or getting rid of those that you don’t want. If you have a pile of presents that you don’t like/don’t want perhaps next year you should ask your friends and family to give you vouchers or make donations to charity instead? Or give them a list of things you really need so that they don’t waste their time and money on gifts that you are just going to ditch?

Resolutions particularly of the new regime, giving up things, starting new projects and the like, seems to me to be more of a spring idea. I am claiming January as a ‘recovery’ month. One that allows me to move slowly and to pick up the pieces of my routine in a laid back and steady fashion. I have a million ideas for new projects and plans for this year and they are all ticking away in the back of my head. But I will allow them to percolate a while longer.

I will give myself time to get the mundane routine sorted first, to play catch up with emails and boring, snoring work stuff. Then when the energy of February hits I will be more in the right place to put plans into motion. It will also tie in with Mother Nature and the stirrings beneath her soil, the spark of new life and energy as it begins to awaken from the winter slumber. I shall mirror Mother Earth’s energy and go with her flow.

I also don’t want or need the pressure of setting myself goals that I know I am not going to keep. That is just disappointment from the start. Let’s get rid of the ‘expectations’ of a ‘new you’ by the end of January. Perhaps it is better to take some time this month to decide what kind of ‘you’ you want to become or even if you do, maybe you like yourself just the way you are. Maybe that’s the key point here. There is so much pressure to set resolutions to make changes to yourself, why would you want to do that? Do you really need to make changes or are you just being gathered up in the wake of resolution pressure?

Of course, if you want to make changes, my advice would be to think about them first. Take some time this month to recover, recoup and recharge before embarking on any new regimes. Do some research, meditate, seek guidance and come up with a real plan of action that you can role out slowly and at your own pace. And if you really want to make changes, start with small ones that are achievable, little bite size pieces that you can tackle easily. One step at a time.

And I certainly won’t beat myself up because I haven’t made any resolutions…now pass me the left-over mince pies…


To watch a replay of my talk, click below

Photo by Isaac Smith on Unsplash


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